If love is a battlefield, then dating as a Christian is like storming the beaches of Normandy. There are many pitfalls awaiting single people who are on the dating scene but for those attempting to live a life pleasing to God it can prove difficult at times. Luke 14:28 says, "If you are going to build a tower you have to first count the cost." Building a Godly relationship is no different. Count the cost; examine the risk, as well as the rewards. Mistakes will happen but if you have carefully prayed while examining the situation, you can minimize the casualties. Here are a few suggestions to keep in mind in helping Christians avoid some of the common mistakes made while dating online or offline.
Do not rely heavily on your emotions. Proverbs 4:23; "Guard your heart more than anything else, because the source of your life flows from it." Too many times people become overwhelmed by emotions. Some Christians give their hearts to others without knowing if it is God's will for their life. Looking for "the one" while seeking compatibility is a question you must answer right away before pursuing a relationship with anyone. One can have many things in common with some one else but this does not mean they are one's soul mate. Be careful of the overwhelming emotions of having common ground with someone that may peak one's interest.
Do not give place to the Devil. No one likes to think of themselves as being vulnerable to tricks, or as the Bible calls them "the wiles" of the devil but let us face it we are all human. As children, parents set curfews, critiqued friends, while telling their children who was and was not right for them but as an adult who is that voice whispering in one's ear. A common weakness of Christians is placing themselves in situations where temptation is evident. These situations can be performing heavy kissing while spending countless hours alone with one another.
One may convince themselves that the person they are dating is the person they will share their life with and in return, they will let their guard down while succumbing to temptation. This is why boundaries need to be established while allowing a good friend to hold one accountable. Dating as a group and attending church functions together especially early on in a relationship can help in finding a comfort zone while avoiding some of these common traps.
"The little foxes spoil the vines": Song of Solomon 2:15. Churches have been witnessed in falling apart and relationships have been ruined over doctrinal issues that have no bearing over eternity. It is best that one dates someone with consistent doctrinal values as a Christian while keeping Jesus Christ as the foundation of the relationship.
Disagreements over scripture can prove disastrous when Christian dating. A good rule of thumb is to ask, "Will this disagreement create compromise on core values?" If one can answer "no" to this question then move forward, but on the other hand if one answers "yes" then both parties involved must come to an understanding that this is where the dating relationship should end.
Jesus states, "All men would know that we were his disciples because we loved each other". If one decides to leave the Christian dating relationship then go separate ways disagreeing but while making every effort to be kind to one another. Sometimes Christians not unlike others may need a friend far more than needing a date.
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